Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Easy now. Don't be jealous.

You don't have a picture of yourself reflecting in the bathroom mirror washing the dishes you eat out of? 
What's wrong with you?!

Fine.  Maybe I'm the one with the problem.

I'm starting to realize why we got such a STEAL of a DEAL on our darling house.

Let's review:

1- some of you may recall the hiddeous odor under the kitchen sink upon move in
..turns out it was piles & piles of rat/opossum nests under our house
...the fix-it guy came & hauled out boxes & boxes of rodent feces
...he then covered the crawl space with putrid chemicals
...me, being 6 months pregnant, went into psycho mom mode & ran away with my fetus & 2 year old to Tahoe for the rest of the week to avoid any developmental complications (you know, things like Avy's toes falling off or Linc being born with 2 heads)
Thank heavens he turned out as adorable as he did:

2- our roof needed to be fixed & somehow it coincidentally took place 2 days, I repeat 2 DAYS, before I gave birth

3- also upon move in, we only had 1 working burner on our stove...& it was a small one.
...we bugged the property management company for WEEKS about getting it fixed, but to no avail
...then one day I was cooking on my 1 small burner & the knob completely busted off
...the only way to get the stove to turn on & off was to head outside & flip the breaker---every single time I cooked
...I called a couple days later & used my harshest outdoor voice to get a new stove
...we got one the following morning

4- turns out we've had carbon monoxide spewing into our garage the past month & a half
...genius roofers forgot to attach something to something from something
(I think it had to do with the water heater)
...in true Atwood Male fashion, Tat & his Dad spotted it & fixed it
...This is my true genius husband:

5- & now to the broken sink
...it's my fault...I'll admit it.
...so I go this itch to clean out my fridge & found lots of pot roast from the previous week
...I guess I overestimated the power of the garbage disposal
...it all got clogged in there...really fast
...Tyler tried to fix it

...my plumber friend Kaari tried to fix it

Kidding.  She's not a plumber.  & she shouldn't give up her day job of being a socialite, traveling, partying,  & eating expensive fine foods because she didn't fix it.

...so I called the management company 4 times & did dishes in the bathroom sink for 6 days.
...most of those times I chatted with the same lady that said,
"Oh yes.  I'll get back to you."
...by call #4, I told her,
"You already told me that.  I'm doing dishes in the bathroom & that sink will be clogged soon too.
Help me."

...We got a plumber the next morning.

Really though, our house isn't all that bad.
We have a nice big backyard that's perfect for throwing parties.
And let's be honest...
that's really all that matters.


Matt and Jessie said...

Yikes! I thought I had it bad. My dishwasher was broken for a week and I honestly thought it was something I could die from. The rodent talk made me puke a little bit. Thank goodness that was the first thing to be fixed! I hope that this will be the end of your house problems for a while. Sounds like you have had your share!! Love ya! I would love to come visit you someday! Hopefully that someday is soon!! :)

Valerie said...

good grief, the rat feces makes me itch all over. I swear these kind of problems always come all at once. I hope this is the end of them and you can get back to the important things in life, like throwing parties in the back yard ;)
I wish we could come to the parties!

Beckie said...

You crack me up - I'd be in a ball in tears and screaming obscenities - you have the head on your shoulders to 1)take a photo, and 2) wait six days. Wow! Love the stories - keep 'em coming!

candace said...

we can empathize with the whole "doing dishes in the bathroom" thing. i was finally grossed out enough that we switched to paper/plastic-ware. i'm sure after all you've been through, nothing else could go wrong...right?

McDonalds said...

You are funny. Aren't fixer-uppers exciting! I am glad it is fixed...until then next adventure.

The Mostess said...


Being a traveling, partying, fine food eating socialite, even I know that you can't throw a party without a working kitchen. Or 3 ginorm crockpots, for that matter.

You need to channel your inner mean/crazy lady and get things done the first time. Think Heather T. (Love ya, girl!!)

I'm not a plumber--but I played one on Thanksgiving. With great success!

Kara said...

Ugh what a hassle! Its one thing to have all of those things to go wrong, its a whole other thing to have people no get back to you in time. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you that nothing else goes wrong. Its also a good thing you went to Tahoe during the poop/chemical festival in your house because Linc turned out to be one of the cutest babies i've ever seen. Good call.

Stephanie said...

Oh my gosh....that was so funny. The worst one was the carbon monoxide in the garage.

Atwoods said...

yeah...poisonous gases...not so funny. the rest is a laugh a minute.

Kevin and Kristina said...

that is awful and funny at the same time...

Tracy said...

I feel you girl! Just ask Austin about all the issues that occur at our house. I just say...as I call the landlord...I am so glad I don't own this house...and then I look at the backyard and feel better :) LOVE your blog...need to come here more often!

Alie said...

oh, hayley. That is quite a list... but you did get it for quite a steal!? Please call Steve if you have any more plumbing issues!!!